God is doing a huge work in me right now.
I have been praying for God to use me, lead me, guide me, and prune me. Yes, I prayed for pruning. I admit it. I know that I can only serve Him if I let Him into EVERY area of my life and that means that everything that is not His Will for my life goes.
The problem comes when you pray for Him to do those things and then you don't listen. You soon find out that if you don't listen, He stops talking. As my Pastor says: When you don't hear Him anymore, go back to the last thing He told you to do and make sure to do it.
He has been urging me to "circle my wagons" lately. It is hard to explain in words exactly what that means to me, but I know in my spirit exactly what it is. I am closing my life in and getting rid of anything that is not producing right now. I am pruning the branches that are not productive so that I can give more life to that which is. We are closing in our family and our activities until that which is left is the best of the best and meets the criteria for where God is leading us. There is only so much of me to go around and it was getting spread thinner and thinner until I felt like I was not doing anything well.
Yesterday was a "day of reckoning" for me. God spoke to me through His word in my morning Bible reading. What He spoke to me was not new, just a reminder of what I already knew. I hemmed and hawed and thought I could avoid it. By noon, I was so very uncomfortable and agitated in my spirit that I was just having an AWFUL day. I took the drastic leap of actually TRUSTING GOD and doing what I needed to do.
It was amazing.
By last night I felt like I had lost 100 lbs! (I wish I looked like it too!) Just by making some decisions that needed to be made and taking care of some issues that needed to be taken care of, just by FOLLOWING GOD'S WILL, I felt so much peace and happiness. I thought I would be so upset by my decisions but God truly freed me from sadness, discomfort, and guilt.
I woke up today with a smile on my face and heard God talking to me ALL DAY! HALLELUJAH!
Soooooo, in case you are wondering (which I know you are), these are some of the changes I made yesterday:
1. I put my beloved cat up for adoption. I have two takers right now. I am waiting to see which one will work out better for him.
2. I finally started the process of getting rid of myspace. I will actually be deleting the page tomorrow. I used it to advertise Battlecry for a few days, first.
3. I talked to Michael and he agreed to letting Shooky Do, his boston terrier puppy, stay outside all day during the day.
4. I closed the pool for the season. The girls were hoping for a few more weekends, including maybe an end of summer party but they will have to wait for a beginning of summer party instead.
5. I quit some online groups.
6. This is the most shocking - I quit my longtime homeschool group.
7. The rest of the changes are more private and not to be shared but equally, if not more, important.
I am really excited about the changes! I did have some fleshly twinges of sadness and guilt today, but I was able to overcome them by knowing that I am following God's will. And what changes he has wrought in ONE day! Things I never expected. It was wonderful having my Best Friend back, whispering in my ear all day.
What peace! God is SOOO good! HALLELUJAH!