Today I put Kaedy in a lid from her toy box, filled with water! It was cute, she was splashing a little bit, but mostly sat there looking around. I am going to try to find her a little blow-up pool to take up there and then we will be able to play more! I am also going to get her some rubber duckies and other floatable toys. I think she would like those!

Brittany spent the day with Mickey and Susan's granddaughter Oksana today. She had a wonderful time and can't wait to see Oksana again. Their grandson Arik is a little cutie! He likes to laugh and has a great big smile.

We are going to go search for a van tonight and go out to dinner. I will let you know how it goes!

I can't believe I haven't written in 5 days...I am always "talking" to my blog and I have ideas everyday of what I am going to write, I guess I just don't have as much time to write it down. LOL.

Kaedy is doing well...really stable (although they have her on an antibiotic, they did a culture and said she came up with some "bugs")...and lots of fun. The girls and I did physical therapy with her today and she was weight bearing on her own again and she was laying on her tummy just fine until she laid her head down on my wedding ring and started crying. That pretty much ended the tummy time. She also sat on her own, unhelped for several minutes at a time. Then she would start to tip so Micah would just use a finger or two to direct her back toward the right way and she caught on really well. She learned to correct herself when she felt herself falling. The girls and I also fed her "real" food today. She didn't mind it in her mouth at all, but wouldn't swallow it. I had to leave her with a nurse trying to get her to swallow it since we were lunching with a friend and Kaedy was taking her own sweet time! :-) Michael had a lot of fun with her tonight, too, they rocked, sang, prayed, and blew rasberries.

The girls and I had lunch with dear friends from church - Mickey and Susan. I stayed and chatted with Susan for a few hours while the girls played and watched a movie. I am so glad to have them in our life, they are such a blessing. Susan and I are both from New Mexico and it is nice to be able to talk to someone who knows where I am from! We are different in other ways, she has great faith and just believes what she learns and I question everything. I think we will be very good for each other. :-)

My car had some problems this week. It had been shaking for a few weeks and been getting worse and worse. On Monday, after I left the hospital, while talking to Michael on the phone, my car started shaking wildly. So much that I was scared to stay on the highway. He told me to get oiff and to go on city streets. He called our mechanic and asked if I could drop the car off there so I drove it across town to Broken Arrow and dropped it off with him. He said that the shaking was the tires and that it also needed a new power steering pump and rack and pinion steering. When Michael got off of work, he went and got my car and took it and bought a new set of tires. It drove incredibly better after that! We took it back to our mechanic's and left it there overnight for him to work on in the morning. We got the estimate the next day - it was going to be around $1200. We decided that my car was not worth getting that much work done, being over 145,000 miles. So Michael is taking me to buy a new car this weekend. (we had been rolling the idea back and forth for awhile, anyway, he wanted me to have a vehicle with less miles.) I want to get the same kind because I love my Dodge Grand Caravan. Unless we find a GREAT deal on something else, that is what we are going to get.

We went to Big Splash (our water park) yesterday. We had a really great time, although I was hoping to hang out with Paula while we were there but we lost her after lunch and never found her or the boys again. We figured out today that we must have been at opposite attractions and just switching places at the same times. Next time I am going to stick with her like glue! :-) Part of the reason we got these season passes was so we would have time to hang out! I got sunburnt although I was wearing the same protection as the girls and was in the water for the same length of time (I bought the extra-super waterproof all-day stuff so we wouldn't have to reapply.) Just before the time we were going to leave I could feel myself burning and figured I was in trouble. Paula's head got sunburnt, though, and her poor scalp is almost purple it is so burnt! Purple is our favorite color, but.......... I think we'll wear hats next time!

I need to head to bed, just one more thing before I go.....I have been on Atkins for 17 days and I have lost 10 pounds so far!!! YEAH!! I feel great and I don't feel deprived at all (okay, except for Susan's banana bread, that has been the biggest temptation so far). I have not had to worry about feeling starved or missing out on good things or anything. I found a new comfort food last night.....creamed cauliflower.....in fact, I may eat it for breakfast, instead of the grits I used to eat. It is almost the same consistency!

See ya later, alligators!

Today was another AWESOME day with Kaedy. I got there late, even though I got up at 6 am this morning to get going......I went grocery shopping first - hubby wanted me to stay home yesterday to hang out with him, and I don't shop on Saturdays, so he convinced me to get up early and go. Since we are still new to the Atkins diet I am checking every label, so it took a looooong time to shop. I got out of there, came home, unloaded and put everything away, took a shower and FINALLY got to the hospital.

Kaedy was asleep but as soon as I said "hi" she opened her eyes and gave me a HUGE smile. Raj came in to give her a breathing treatment (he said he had already been waiting for me to come for hours so he HAD to do it then) so I couldn't pick her up. I sat her up in the crib and we played with her dancing monkey (and she danced again) and we played with her little yellow guy that laughs. Everytime the little yellow guy laughs he says something like "woohoo" or "yippee." I would copy him and say the same thing and Kaedy would laugh out loud! It was SOO cute. We also sang, played patty cake, and read. After an hour or so we started to get tired so we put the mat on the ground and slept for awhile. I love sleeping with her. I love feeling her hot breath on my face and I like it when she plays with my face. She likes to put her hands in my mouth...she is exploring!

She had another milestone today - she took a toy and put it in her mouth! They have been wanting her to do that and she finally is!

I bought the girls a slip and slide this morning at Walmart. I knew they would be excited and that way they would have something fun and cool to do in this hot weather whithout leaving home. They hooked it up and started to use it and it broke immediately!!! I have to take it back this week. They did have fun on it, anyway, though. Brittany spent the last few days at a friend's named Averi. She had a GREAT time over there and got to relax and really have some fun. It is nice to have great friends!!!

I have to figure out how to make my schedule work a little better. I need a "little" fine tuning on it. I am still having problems figuring out childcare for my kids while I see Kaedy, getting everything done at home, getting school done and feeding my family home cooked meals! I WILL get it all together though. I have the mind of Christ! (1 Corinthians 2:14-16)

We have taken Kaedy out of her room two days in a row now. Yesterday we went to see Bunny - one of our nurses who is having a surgery herself. She was up a few floors from Kaedy. Today Emily and I took her to the play room and we showed her some new toys and had a good time with her in there. I can't believe she is over 20lbs!! She is HUGE! Emily was 20 pounds around one year. Kaedy can't even come home in the backwards facing car seat. She is already too big!

Brittany is spending the night at a friend's house tonight. She was so excited. She also had a Keepers of the Home meeting today. They were learning about quilting. She has already quilted some, but now she can get her quilting badge. :-)

Tonight is church...I am so excited! I love our church. It seems like such a long time between services from Sunday to Thursday. I would be happy with another service in between those two! I love being filled with The Word. There is nothing better!

Today was the first day of our new schedule...it went really well. We both really enjoyed spending time with her and Micah said that she would be there around 1:30 to do physical therapy with her. I had fun today playing with her and reading to her. She is getting SOOO big....over 19lbs. I tried to do "ride a little horsey" with her on my knee but she is too heavy!

For the past three days she has been "dancing." She has a musical toy and we turn it on she starts bopping back and forth. Since her head is so big, if she starts getting too excited, she falls over! LOL It is so cute. I have video of it that I will put on our picture-page as soon as I have a chance!

Our Doctor finally feels that Kaedy is big enough and doing well enough on the vent to go to San Antonio. He called them and they asked for an MRI. She had one done and it was overnighted to them last week. Our Doctor kept thinking we would be going any minute. (they had said they would squeeze us in) As of today, he talked to San Antonio and found out that Dr. Campbell is out doing surgeries around the country for 2 weeks, so our doctor won't even be talking to him until the 29th. He told me just to pray. He really wants her to get seen in soon because as she gets older one of the problems she has is getting worse. (paradoxical chest movement) He is worried if we wait too long, she will actually get worse.

I am not worried because: Kaedra is the Body of Christ. She is redeemed from the curse, because Jesus bore her sicknesses and carried her diseases in His own body. By His stripes she is healed. We forbid any sickness or disease to operate in her body. Every organ, every tissue, every bone functions and is formed in the perfection in which God created it to function. HALLELUJAH!!!!

We got great news today from the physical therapist - Micah. Kaedy (for the first time) put weight on her feet while held up! Micah was so excited and the excitement was contagious. She was thrilled that Kaedy made that step in her development.

We decided to change things around in Kaedy's (and our) life. She is not getting out of bed enough or having enough stimulation during the day, and Michael and I want to change that. We don't want her development to be slowed. We decided that I would go every morning 9-11, physical therapy will go every afternoon and Michael will go every evening. That, along with the nurses putting her in her exersaucer every day should get her *closer* to a normal life. If she was at home she would be out of her crib all day, except for naps, so I really want her out as much as possible there. I mean, if a baby was at home and kept in her crib all day long, DHS would come and take the baby away from the parents!!!

Anyway, it will make Paula happy who thinks all babies should be on schedules! ;-)

Today was one of my favorite visits! The girls and I stayed for about 2 hours and it *almost* seemed like being at home. We played with her, fed her peaches and cereal, cuddled with her, she fell asleep and we watched part of Cinderella. I just rocked her and the girls were just hanging out watching the movie...we closed the door and the curtain and it seemed like we were in our own little world. We have NEVER stayed there for 2 hours (I don't think we have ever stayed there for an hour) so it was really a GREAT visit.

Church tonight was awesome too. I just LOVE our church. I love my pastor and I love the members of our church. It really feels like family, even though I have only gone there for about 8 months. I love our Pastor's vision and I am so happy to be part of it. I can't wait to see the strides our church takes over the next many years.

Well Kaedy got to go outside yesterday for her first time. That was SOOO exciting. I was all dressed up in a hat and "picnic" clothes because we were going to go have a picnic after my visit with her. Broken Arrow has concerts in their main park on the Tuesdays in June. We usually take a picnic and our lawn chairs and enjoy that every year. Anyway, because I we were going to go to the picnic and because Kaedy was going to have her first outting, I thought I should dress for an "outting." The nurses thought it was hysterical that I was all dressed out to go out. We got Kaedy ready (Sherria came too) and we took her to the elevator. I was so excited I was telling everyone on the elevator (we were on the special "dr" elevator - not the regular one). When we got down to the bottom floor we went past the gift shop and out the front door. Unfortunately, that is where all the cars come in to drop people off, but it was still outdoors!!! She blinked and blinked and blinked. She was just AMAZED at the sun, you could tell. (and it was a cloudy day!) We took her over by a tree and Bunny, one of our nurses, hid behind the tree and made it talk and move. Kaedy was mesmerized. After that, we took her across the driveway to a little sitting area. She started to de-sat a little bit (her oxygen numbers were going down) so I picked her up and cuddled with her. She went immediately back up. She just needed something familiar in that "big exciting world!" Speaking of exciting, just about that time a medical helicopter showed up above us to land. I thought for sure that was going to freak her out. Sure enough, I looked and she was de-satting fast! I was worried and was about to put her back in the stroller and hurry inside when I realized that her tubing wasn't attached to her trach!!!!! Poor thing wasn't getting any oxygen. "HELLO MOMMY, some oxygen would be nice!! I don't care about the stupid helicopter, I would just like to BREATHE!" After that excitement we took her back into the hospital through admissions and back upstairs. She started making noise as soon as we entered her room! It was very cute. Like she knew that was "her place." We cuddled with her a little bit and then went to the concert.

The concert was AWFUL...some gospel band that had been together for 40 years. It sounded like it would be wonderful, but it wasn't. We left half-way through. Michael and I weren't feeling that well, anyway, being on day 2 of the Atkins diet (our bodies not used to the lack of sugar!!) and Sherria had a bad headache. On top of that, it was the girls' bedtime.

Anyway, the exciting part was taking Kaedy out. The girls and I are going back tomorrow and maybe we can take her out again, I am not sure yet.

Today is Kaedy's 7 month birthday. 7 months ago I gave birth to her at 215pm. That is a really hard day to remember. Maybe it will be easier after she comes home. I went to see her tonight and it was one of my least-favorite visits with her. She was grumpy, gave me no smiles, fussed and was all around ill-tempered. Nothing at all like usual. Her room was dark when I got there - the blinds were closed - so it looked like a cave. She was doing absolutely nothing....just laying in bed. No toys around her, no music on, no video on, nothing. Just laying there. And, on top of it, she was dirty. She was sticky (like she had been sweaty), had white stuff all over her face and her hands were really dirty between the fingers. I felt totally out of control (although I took control as soon as I got there - cleaned her up, sat her up, fed her some applesauce/cereal, turned on music, got some toys out, etc). I hate leaving her in someone else's care everyday. I was trying to decide what the difference is between Kaedy's situation and letting someone else raise my baby while I just go for visitation, like a foster situation. There is really not a big difference (except of course in the intention) and I hate that. I have "visitation rights" and I can come and see her, but I don't have any say over anything going on with her, over what she wears, when she is clean or not clean, what she does all day. I hate it that she lays there all day without doing anything. I hate it that I can't spend more time with her. Okay, when it gets right down to it - I hate it that she's not home. I hate it that she has any problems at all. I hate that her healing is not manifested. I hate it that she needs a healing to be manifested. At least I know that Greater is He who is in me, than he who is in the world. I am an overcomer. I am above and not below, I am the head and not the tail. I am blessed in the city and blessed in the country. I am blessed coming in and blessed going out. HALLELUJAH!!!!

I have been having a grumpy day. I must have woken up on the wrong side of the bed! Everything has gone right today but I just seem to have misplaced my smile. I am working on getting it back.

Anyway - I went to see Kaedy today and took my mother-in-law with me so that she could have some Kaedy-time too. She doesn't get to see her too often. We took her out on the floor in her stroller - up and down the hallway a few times and talked with her about the animal borders. She was tired when we started and got more tired as we went, so we got back and I rocked her to sleep. I love it when she cuddles up against me. I wore my hair down today and when I first saw her, she tried to grab my hair and put it in her mouth. I am also trying to get her to lift her arms when she wants me to pick her up. She is just starting to do it and it is so cute.

I came home this afternoon, took a nap and went to church for prayer night. It is a stormy night with tornado warnings, so Michael is glued to the weather channel. We have a new channel that has 24 hour local weather news. Only in Oklahoma are people so obsessed with the weather. :-)

Well, things are going really well with Kaedy....
She is eating "real" baby food. With a spoon, through her mouth! She is doing well with it, as well as I would expect any baby to do. She has also gotten to go out of her room in her stroller a few times! We have taken a few trips around the floor as well as an extended trip to the playroom on Memorial Day.

She is stable on the home ventilator and ready to be transported to San Antonio as soon as they are ready for her. She had an MRI on Wednesday to send to the doctors down there and hopefully we will hear from them today or early next week. Our doctor seems to think we will be going very soon. After we get back, he said that Kaedy can come home in 2-4 weeks. We are really shooting for Independence Day! :-) We could celebrate Kaedy's independence! :-)

I haven't seen her for a few days because I have been sick with something contagious. (doctor didn't tell me what it was. ) As of today I have been on my antibiotics for 36 hours so I shouldn't be contagious anymore. I am so excited to see her!!!! I am also hoping to hear back from San Antonio today so we can start making some plans!!

Tonight Paula and I are going to a used book fair. We go to this one every year. It is a good one. :-) Only problem is: Neither of us really has a list of what we need for next year (which isn't going to be much) and neither of us has our millionaire bank accounts manifested yet. (Well....maybe by tonight) So we may just be mostly browsing. I got some good games there last year, but haven't even used them all yet.

Kids are going swimming with Sherria at her best friend's apt today. They will have a blast. They have been excited all morning. I did manage to get them to clean the house though, as a condition of them going. Don't you hate how when "momma" is sick the WHOLE house falls apart????

Kaedy in the playroom at the hospital